Thomas David Wright

Beware the unsupported knorks

Today I thought I’d share some unabashed childishness.

Behold: The wobbly boob simulator.

It’s NSFW, but otherwise oddly enjoyable. A bit like an organic lava lamp…

To redeem myself from perversion, I’d like to encourage you all to donate to Cancer Research UK.

Have a lovely Sunday evening,

Tom

I, for one, do not welcome our musical robot overlords

As a continuation of our coverage of the impending invasion (Football and BigDog) of mechanical nightmares, allow me to present the Trons:

Just like their football playing chums, they aim to ingratiate themselves by learning our customs and pastimes. We must be resilient! We cannot allow these usurpers of earth to win our hearts, for as soon as we do, they’ll whip out their neurotoxin spikes and jab us into excruciating eternity!

I suggest you learn more (so as to better prepare yourselves) by visiting The Trons myspace page.

Over and out,

Tom x

Ever see Ants eat a Gecko?

If you (like me) have always wondered what it’d be like to see a swarm of ants dismantle a gecko, then today is your lucky day:

The really amazing thing is that it’s only 24 hours before they’re trying valiantly to coordinate the dragging of the large bones. I guess this is why there aren’t tons of dead animals lining the floor of the rainforests. Yay.

Tom’s summer todo list (of doom)

Image by jienni.

Hola infidels!

Sorry for the lack of postage recently - I’ve been busy scuttling around the South. Saw Radiohead on Tuesday, which was nice…

But I’m back in Brighton now, and this post isn’t going to be about my southern scuttlings or my radioheaderings. No, this post marks the beginning of my productive summer and as such, is a comprehensive todo list of all the things I’d love to achieve before I start my third year. So, in no particular order…

Todo:

• Make a documentary
  With Dan, Tom and Ellie I plan to make a documentary about the increasing marketisation of education. Filming is gonna start early July, but nothings set in stone yet. If you want more information please get in touch.
• Redo epicentre from scratch.
  Epicentre is an open-source multimedia project which aims to connect people with events. The Sussex installation is a comprehensive What’s On guide for campus. The rebuild will be primarily a back-end redesign using symfony, but we’ll also aim to fix some niggling design issues. Get in touch if you’re a Sussex student who’d be interested in joining in, or if you’re interested in launching your own installation. Credit to Anya for forcing me to start this project in the beginning.
• Officially start up the Students with Dependants association
  There are loads of families on campus, but they currently lack any form of representation. I’m hoping to start a representative association (with an elected officer) which would receive funding for the union. Possible projects which the SwD association could take on include a toy library, a network of (CRB checked) baby-sitters or a campaign for better financial support. Get in touch if you’re a student with dependants, or if you feel like lending a hand with setting it all up.
• Make some websites
  Mal and I are hoping to take on some web-design commissions this summer. So if you, or someone you care about, needs a beautiful, hardworking website please get in touch for a very reasonable quote.
• Learn French
  I took French as a GCSE and tried to use it whilst travelling in Europe, but my actual conversational ability is far from adequate. I really ought to get my act together and learn French - especially if I want to go and study at the Brain & Mind Institute at the French speaking Swiss university EPFL.
• Form an orienteering society
  Orienteering is great fun and an easy way to keep active. The Sussex campus (nestled in the south downs) is ideal for orienteering, but there’s no routes laid out nor any groups based at the university. We (Lisa and I) want to put markers out, get some maps (etc) and start organising outings. An inner-campus event would be great during freshers week to get newbies accustomed to the various buildings.
• Pack to move house
  My new house is rather splendid. I’m getting increasingly impatient about moving, but we’re not actually getting the keys til the end of August.

I’m counting on you all nagging me incessantly to make sure I get it all done. Please don’t let me get lazy!

If you’ve got any other ideas or want my help with a project you’re organising, please get in touch. Likewise, if you’re able and willing to help with anything mentioned above, drop me a line. You’re free to do this either in the comments, in person or via the contact form.

Tom x

Big Dog

In case you missed it, my earlier post about robots is essential reading.

Unfortunately, those bumbling football droids have been successful in lulling us into a false sense of security…

Behold - Big Dog:

Just look at that thing and tell me you’re not terrified! It makes that terrifying, attack-of-the-bees, noise too… *shudder* And look at the way it gets up from the ice! Argh! How can Boston Dynamics responsibly consider the continuing development of this abomination? Their site says:

In separate trials, BigDog runs at 4 mph, climbs slopes up to 35 degrees, walks across rubble, and carries a 340 lb load.

What they fail to mention is that, in separate trials, BigDog also displayed homicidal tendencies towards the researchers, pillaged the local town and ate the children from the school. Imagine if they put blasters guns on it:

You have been warned.

Tom x

Porn for the blind

You read that right: Freakin’ Porn for the Blind!

And it’s exactly like you might imagine¹ - spoken descriptions of porn sites. In their own words:

Porn for the Blind is a not-for-profit organization dedicated to producing audio descriptions of sample movie clips from adult web sites. This service is provided free of charge.

Unfortunately they seem to be overwhelmed with the amorous blind - they’re website seems to be running at 1/8 the speed of a dead tortoise. Luckily for you lot, I was gallant enough to spend literally minutes instructing my computer to download the files. So, for your delectation and delight, may I humbly present some choice samples of Porn for the Blind…

• “Big Sausage Pizza”
  
• “Big Tits Round Asses”
  
• “All Internal”
  
• and perhaps most worryingly “Mom’s Anal Adventure”
  

Well kids, you heard it here first. Go forth and enjoy.

Tom x

2 Climate Change sites: Stick and Carrot

Image by Foto43.

I’m not going to say much about these links as they really speak for themselves.

First, the stick: A compendium of responses to climate change sceptics.

A great list of common objections to climate change and the appropriate responses. It’s usefully indexed into categories: Stages of denial, Scientific topics, Types of argument and Level of sophistication. This means there are lots of ways to find the objection you’re looking for and makes it really easy to visualise.

I believe it’s incredibly important to show that climate change is very real, that we are causing it and that we can do something about it. This sites great for showing anyone why their misconceptions are unfounded.

I guess it’s only really a stick if you’re a climate change sceptic… Otherwise, you get to buff up your climate change knowledge and get a free carrot to boot! About that…

Next, the carrot: Beautiful interactive concept city.

This is nothing short of lovely. It’s not just beautifully illustrated, but it has some wonderful ideas.

That’s your lot I’m afraid, hope you’ve had your fill.

Tom x

“The robot is going to lose…”

The robot is going to lose. Not by much. But when the final score is tallied, flesh and blood is going to beat the damn monster. - Adam Smith

It’s always good to be reassured that the (inevitable) robot domination of the planet is still a fair way off. So my thanks go to Curious Cat for posting this video:

Just like real footballers, they can’t stop falling over. Unlike real footballers, they get up again (sort of). There’s a prize for the first person to tell me how Robot dives there are in the video…

So if Mr Smith is wrong, we’ll know how to welcome our evil robot overlords - we’ll fight them on the beaches run at them with footballs.

And behold! Salvation rides a mighty green lizard!

Found this on my wanderings…

And now I can’t stop thinking about Jesus hosting dinosaur fights with the disciples. I therefore provide below a table of the contestants and their scaly, toothy steeds:

So there you have it. The next logical step is to place your bets on who the victor would be…

Ever wondered what goes into Mystery Meat?

Whilst stumbling around the internet at the weekend I found this: Placenta Party.

And I have to admit, I was a little grossed out. And very lost for words. But, when all’s said and done, I really don’t have any moral objections at all. It’s just a bit icky isn’t it?

Anyhow, hats off to him, but that’s not what I want to feature in this article. I’d like to draw your attention, dear reader, to the comments. Have a quick flick through - some of them are absolutely ace! Some of my faves:

FUCKING SICK. YOU FUCKERS ARE NASTY AS HELL.

and

ME DAS PUTO ASCO DESDE HOY ME HAGO VEGETARIANO PUTO GUIRI LOCO¹

and

where did you get the placenta?²

The best thing about the comments is the dialogue though, and that I shall not spoil for you. Go have a chuckle. Let me know what you think.

Tom